1-1-11

HAPPY ONE MONTH BIRTHDAY TO OUR LITTLE MEN!!!!

Sweet Little Kohen!

Love his cheeks!

Favorite!!!

Sleepy little Kennan!

Such a sweet little guy!!

Love this little man!

Daddy & Daughter Date Night

Jordan came home today with a Dora princess dress for Princess Kelsie to wear to go out on a date with her Daddy! Chuck E Cheese for dinner and then off to see Tangled!! She was SOOOO excited! So thankful she has such a wonderful Daddy who loves to do special things with her!

Kelsie in her new Princess dress Daddy got for her!

Talking about what they wanted to do on their date!

She was SO happy and excited!

All dressed up and ready to go!

She loves her Daddy!

A "Brudder" Story

After 7 1/2 long and trying months our sweet boys came into our world December 1, 2010! Though they were 6 weeks early we are so grateful that they are very healthy little boys! We are so in love with them!

The last few weeks of the pregnancy I had been battling with issues of preeclampsia. The Doctors were watching me very carefully since my blood pressure had moments where it would spike etc. They had told me to look for other signs as well. As the weeks went on these other symptoms also started to appear. One thing they had told me to look for was upper gastric pain around my liver. Doesn't that just sound pleasant?! Well, on November 27th around 4am I woke up in terrible pain so I called the Dr. and he said to go in to the hospital to be looked at. When I got there they did lab work etc. and saw that my liver enzyme level was elevated so they decided to keep me.

The next few days were a very long roller coaster ride. One hour I would feel fine and the next I would feel awful and my blood pressure would spike. They decided that it was best not to send me home at this point but to keep me from then until to boys came - whenever that may be. At this point I was only 34 weeks so they were trying to hold off on delivering the boys as far as they possibly could to give them a better chance to have less complications with their lungs etc.. They said that every day that they kept them inside of me that would keep them out of the NICU for two.

Around 9pm on November 30th I started to have the awful upper gastric pain again. They came in and gave me a shot of staidol (sp)for the pain. It helped for a while (as well as made me say all kinds of crazy things - like telling Jordan that my Best friend lived in a bubble gum machine house that was blue and she needed to be nice and stop yelling at her Chinese neighbor about her rug. She doesn't even have a Chinese neighbor- nor does she live in a bubble gum machine!ha!) But once the meds wore off the pain was still there. So they tried to give me another pain medication around midnight but it didn't do anything at all. At this point (around 4am) it was getting much much worse so the nurse decided that the Doctor needed to come back in and these babies needed to be born before my liver literally burst.


By 4:45am the Doctor was there, our parents were called and we were headed back to the operating room. It all seemed very quick to me and I was so excited that not only would I be meeting my sons but would also no longer be in pain. Well, that kind of pain at least - c-section recovery is a whole other story! They did the spinal and gave me a few different shots of antibiotics in case my liver decided to cause problems during surgery. All of the med combinations they gave me so fast made me throw up which was def. not easy or fun when you are tied down to a table laying on your back. Poor little anesthesiologist man who had to hold my head since Jordan wasn't allowed back there yet! He was very nice about it though ha!




At 5:55am Kohen James was born weighing 5 lbs 4 ozs and a few seconds behind him at 5:56am Kennan Mills (pronounced KEN-nan not KEE-nan) was born weighing 4 lbs 9 ozs! As soon as they pulled Kennan out I could instantly breathe again- it was amazing!!! ha! I even said out loud "Oh my goodness I can breathe!" Which made the doctors and nurses bust out laughing! After having to receive a few shots internally because they were having trouble stopping the bleeding because of my Raynoids syndrome I was all sewn/stapled up and headed to recovery. Our sweet boys were sent to the NICU (Neonatal Intensive Care Unit) since they were so early to be evaluated.



After 10 (very looooooong!) hours (I had to be put back on the magnesium sulfate to soak up the toxins from the liver etc. so I had to wait to be able to see them.) I was finally able to be wheeled down to see my sweet boys in the NICU. Jordan was able to go down there a few times throughout the day to see them so he was bringing me back pictures but it was so wonderful to finally be able to go down there myself and see and touch them in real life! I had waited so long to do that!


The Doctors were amazed that they were so healthy and doing so well to be only 34 weeks (and boys, who apparently usually don't do as well as girls.) Kohen had to be on Oxygen for about 8 hours and they both had to have feeding tubes put in but other than that they were perfectly healthy! They had the feeding tubes because there little brains weren't developed enough to think to breath, suck and swallow all at the same time in order to eat. They had the tubes in for about a week and a half until the little light bulb in their brains clicked! Once it turned on they did wonderful! The Doctors wanted to see that they could do it for every feeding for two whole days and then they could come home sweet home!



For the first few days I was completely convinced that they had switched the boys at birth! Kohen who was "Baby A" was supposed to be the smaller of the two but he turned out to be bigger as well as other little things that had me completely convinced they swapped them ha! Since Kohen had the 2 vessel cord we knew that would tell us who really was born first so we asked the nurse to look at the lab report of the cords. Ha! It showed that Kohen really was born as "A" not "B" so they didn't mix them up. (Though I am still skeptical! ha!)



The report also showed that the boys cords were tied together in an incredibly tight knot. Not only were they tied together but Kohen's also had a separate knot in it. This is something that could have made the outcome of my pregnancy very different. We are fully convinced that the Lord allowed me to experience the liver problems in order for these boys to be born before anything happened to them. The Lord definitely had his hands on these little men as well as myself. We are so grateful for His protection!


I was released from the hospital on Sunday the 5th. It was so weird leaving the hospital without my boys. I was not a fan of it! I was so thankful and happy that my parents and siblings (and "Essie" who came flew in for the weekend!)were able to come up and be with us during the first part of my recovery and for the boys stay in the NICU. My Mom was such a huge blessing taking me to the hospital everyday and helping out around the house and with Kelsie and different things. I could not have made it without her!



The first few days of my recovery were really rough. I never knew that it could hurt so bad to wash your hair! Never before have I cried while taking a shower. Thankfully each day got a little easier as far as being able to move. My iron levels dropped incredibly after delivery and they had a hard time getting them back up. When I left the hospital they were at 6.7 (Normal is 10-12) they do a blood transfusion when you get down to 6.5. I am on iron pills 3 times a day and hoping when they recheck it at my 6 week checkup it will be back up a little. They said it could take up to 3 months to get back to a "normal" level. It is definitely not helping me feel energized. I feel exhausted all the time. Between this and 2 newborns I should turn into a zombie any day!


I am still battling these awful headaches. I am hoping in another week or two when the hormones are a little more regulated I won't be having as many! (fingers crossed) My stomach/incision still hurts a lot but seems to be getting a little better. I just can't wait for the day I feel normal again! I am going to celebrate!



On December 13th we were finally able to bring our sweet boys home!!! It was such a great day for us! We were so grateful that the long journey of growing these little men and their arrival had all led to this very special day! This is what we had been waiting for for so many long and hard months! It was a priceless day!

Since they are preemies the Doctors have told us that our first few months will be a little different than most babies. We have a list of cans and cants and have to be extra careful to protect them from germs and illness. It may take them a little longer to do certain things as their little brains are actually 6 weeks "behind" their age but the the doctors told us that by the time they are a year you will hardly be able to notice that they were 6 weeks early and they should then be able to do things just like any other little ones. We are just praying for the Lord to give us the wisdom we need in order to help them grow and develop into the wonderful little men they are going to become.

We are so thankful to the Lord for these little men and for the privilege of being their parents! We love them so much and can't wait for all of the wonderful memories we are going to make as a family! Thank you all for your love, support and most importantly your prayers for us throughout the journey we have had getting to these sweet little "brudders!" Their little lives are a testament to the prayers of God's people and the Lord's faithfulness in answering them.

We are forever grateful.

At home with Big Sister Kelsie!

The Brudders vs. Fridays

Aren't Fridays supposed to be the most exciting day of the week?

Somehow my boys missed this memo and think that it should be the most stressful and eventful! First last Friday which led to a crazy weekend and then today! Whew!

Around 2:30am I woke up in a slight panic because my arms, neck, face and chest were suddenly swollen and completely red. I felt very flush and we checked my blood pressure and it was 141/66. This is incredibly high for me! We have been having trouble keeping it up high enough to be able to take meds because a side effect is that they lower blood pressure so for it to all of a sudden be so high was alarming. So, we had the doctor on call paged and he said that if it didn't go away to call back but if I could just hold out until my Dr. appointment today in their office and they would check me out.

So, I went back to bed still very uneasy about it all and attempted to rest. I woke up and felt ok, not the greatest but nothing like the few hours before. Jordan had to go to work but had done the cutest little things to make it easier on me while he was away. It was the first time he had left me all week so he was trying to make sure I was covered. He had made me a cooler of drinks and snacks to keep beside the couch so I didn't have to get up and had already put pancakes in the microwave so all I would have to do was hit cook to make breakfast. Ha! He is such a good little helper and has been a great nurse, maid, chef and encourager.

I am very thankful for him!

My breakfast J so lovingly prepared for me before he left!

My little cooler of drinks and snacks!

He called around lunchtime to check on me and said he was going to go ahead and come home so he could take me to my Dr. appt since I had had a rough night and it would be a lot of walking (which I haven't been allowed to do) he was concerned it would be too much to do alone. Very thoughtful of him! So off we went.

A new bracelet to add to my collection

By the time we got there I was feeling a little funny again and sure enough by the time the ultrasound was done and we were headed for the stress test I started having another "episode" like this morning- Hot, flush, high bp, swelling.... joy. At least we were at the doctor's office so they could see what was happening first hand. The were worried because these are signs of preeclampsia which can be very dangerous for the mother so they sent me over to the hospital to have some tests done. Yay for being a human pin cushion yet again (not)!

All the test came back ok so they decided to send me home once my BP went down again. They said this could be the beginning of preeclampsia so I have to watch for any pain around my liver, severe headache, spots and more high blood pressure. So basically I have to wait until I feel like total death until they will be able to do anything. Usually the only solution to preeclampsia is that you have to have the babies right away. Which right now I am TOTALLY ok with! ha!

The fun little monitors I have to be hooked up to each week.

The boys looks great on the tests today and the ultrasound showed that their lungs were good and strong! The steroids seemed to do their job! Wahoo! This was really comforting to us to know that if they do need to take them that they look good and strong.

How many monitors can one belly hold?

So now .... we wait. I am beginning to become incredibly drained but and trying to "keep my eyes on the prizes!" The nurse was very honest with me and told me that from here until they come will be very difficult so to try and hang in there as much as I can. I am definitely beginning to feel like I am slowly breaking down but am trying to be strong. Some days are better than others. I am just so emotionally and physically exhausted. So ready to just hold my sweet boys and feel normal again!

I think I can..... I think I can....I think I can.......

The Longest Weekend In History....

It is official. I will never, never, ever again say that I am excited about having just one Doctors appointment on a particular day! ha!


Friday I was very excited that I only had to go to one appointment for my stress test and then could just come home. Well, I totally jinxed myself apparently by saying that!


Friday morning I woke up to a contraction. Not to terrible but enough to be able to know what it was. They have been happening off and on so I didn't really think much about it. My doctors had told me to be watching for them because since the boys are almost a combined 7lbs that my body would start to think that they are "all baked" when instead the body isn't taking into account that there are 2 little people in there and not just one.


I got up still "just not feeling" right and got ready and headed over to the appt. For the stress test they hook up monitors to both babies to watch their heart beats and how that are affected by movement and they also hook up a contraction monitor. I LOVE the sweet little nurses (Liz, Carol and Jeannie) that preform these test. They have become my little friends since they are pretty much all the people I see each week besides Jordan ha! They had mentioned that I didn't seem quite like myself and asked how I was feeling etc. I explained that I "just didn't feel right" but couldn't really describe it. They said they completely understood what I meant and tried to encourage me. It was the same feeling I had the night before/morning that Kelsie was born. Well, low and behold after watching the monitor for a while it was clear that the contractions were getting stronger and closer in range. Being only 32 weeks they decided to wheel me over to the hospital, which is connected to the Doctor's office, to be observed for a while and try to get them to stop.

My new amazing bracelets! Aren't they so stylish!

Once we got into a room they gave me a shot to get the contractions to stop and it worked. So after a few hours of observation to make sure it was under control they gave me a prescription of meds to take every 6 hours and sent me home. Wahoo! Simple problem solved.


We got home and I took the meds and laid down like they had said. Within 2 hours the contractions started back up again. Oh great! Wasn't this what the meds were supposed to prevent? After a while I could tell they were getting stronger again so I called the Dr. she said to take a warm bath and try to relax as much as I could and call her back in an hour. So I did. Bath and then laid down for a while...but as soon as I got up....they were back. Soooo they told me to come back in. So off we went.

My precious Husband who spent the nights with me in the hopsital even though he got VERY little sleep and had to work two 10 hour days back to back!

That second visit to the hospital resulted in a roller coaster of a weekend that I would really love to have to never repeat!!! Lots of shots and pills, VERY little sleep, horrible side affects (including headaches which I had already been battling at this point for 12 days) and emotions that could be great one second then followed by complete uncertainty! Such an exhausting weekend all the way around!

My precious IV. Which had double to tubes because I had fluids and the Magnesium drip...took this after they had already taken the Mag. drip out.

After it showed that the shots of brethine they were giving me were no longer doing the trick to to keep the contractions stopped they started me on an IV of Magnesium Sulfate. I am 100%convinced that this drug was created by the devil himself. Within moments of it being injected you feel like the entire inside of your body is on fire. The nurse kept telling me they refer to it as "fire water" sometimes. It also causes your chest to tighten up and makes it hard to breathe. In the midst of all of this your body begins to also have the shakes which is SO much fun when you feel like you are on fire!

The devil drug. Enough said.

After a few hours the side effects got slightly, very slighty better. The good thing was that it had caused the contractions to stop!!! Success! They still would have to leave me on it though in order to make sure that it would keep them stopped.

The next morning around 6:45am Jordan left to go to work because he couldn't miss so it was just me and my magnesium drip (and of course the nurses) for a while until he could come back around 7pm when he got off. Around 7:30am I got up to go to the bathroom (very fun to do when you are hooked up to an IV poll and have 3 monitors attached to your stomach ha!) and then got right back in bed. Within minutes of that the room was literally spinning and the furniture was dancing around as if to give me my own personal performance of "Beauty and The Beast" , sadly without the singing. My chest started to get incredibly tight also I called my cute little nurse "Sue" who by this point also had a "twin" ha! She came in and said that it meant that there was too much magnesium going into my system so they turned down the dosage. Yay! However it would take at least 4 hours for the level to lower in my body once they brought it down. So it was def. an interesting few hours while it took its precious time to lower. They lowered it a little at a time throughout the day until I was finally able to be off of it completely and switched to a pill medication that didn't have SUCH hard side affects.

Can you imagine since I was seeing double of everything if it meant the boys were too?! They were probably looking around and seeing "4" little boys in there and thinking "where the heck did you come from? It is already crowded enough in here!!!"

The "Michelin Man" boots that squeeze to prevent clots! They also prevent sleeping...at all!

And yes...I did make sure my toe nails were freshly painted before I went into the hopsital...which my Husband and the nurses made fun of me for! But at least they were cute! ha!

Once the magnesium was out of my system and the pills were working I began to feel much better! Still exhausted because I couldn't sleep due to the oh so stylish "boots" they had on my calves that literally puff up like the Michelin man every 30 seconds and squeeze your legs to prevent blood clots, but at least I wasn't on fire! In the middle of the night the nurse came in to give me my pill (I have to take them every 4 hours around the clock) but she needed to check my blood pressure first. It was only 87/45. Not so great. Because a side affect of the pills is that it will lower your blood pressure she couldn't give them to me because it would just make it lower. Which would mean me flat out on the floor whenever I got up! So she held off and said she would come back an hour later. Still the same result. They could not give me the medication until my blood pressure was a minimum of 110/70. This would not happen until about 8 hours later. Which meant no anti-contraction meds in my system which meant...you guessed it... CONTRACTIONS!!!!

So out came the shots of brethine... again, by this point I felt like a human pin cushion. They were doing all they could to make it so I didn't have to go back on the Magnesium again. The shot slowed them down but didn't bring them to a complete stop but held them off long enough to get my BP up enough to have the pills again.

At this point the dr. decided I needed to go ahead and get the steroid shots to help the boys lungs develop faster in the event they decided it was best to go ahead and deliver them. So once again the poking continued. These were the most painful shots because the liquid was really thick and goes straight into your muscle, but at least I know that in the event that these little men can't hold off a few more weeks they will be in much better shape!

So then we come to Sunday! The doctor said as long as everything stayed calm I could leave after my second steroid injection at 6pm! Wahooo!!! My own house, my own bed and a SHOWER!!!! I couldn't get one in the hospital because of all the IV stuff so I was more than ready to feel clean!!! I watched the clock like a hawk all day long ha! I had some contractions on and off but they said that was ok. As long as I didn't feel any really big ones or more than 6 an hour then I was still ok to go home. 3 came, 4 came, 5 came and then 5:07 came. I had a huge contraction and almost burst into tears right then thinking I was literally 53 minutes from being able to go home and this was going to start all over again! Thankfully it was only that one!

So I got my last injection and then finally ....... FREEDOM!!!!!!!!!

I have never been so happy to see this little apartment in my life! ha! I am on strict bed rest which means I have to lay down or on my side at all times and am only allowed up to use the bathroom. Not so fun but I would much rather be doing that here than in the hospital so I will gladly do what I am told! I am on meds around the clock which is slightly annoying since there are on a 9,5,1 schedule but it is ok. I feel like every time I finally get good and asleep I have to wake back up to swallow a pill. Oh well, just preparing me for my long nights with my little men!
So, hopefully as long as these little men cooperate and contractions stay low I will not have to go back to the hospital until it is time to bring these little men into the world! Fingers crossed!!!

So excited about these little hats and that the next time I take them to the hospital there will be little heads to put them on!

I wanted to say THANK YOU all for the calls, texts, messages and prayers! It was incredibly difficult not having any family or close friends around being 562.3 miles away but it was such an encouragement to me to read the messages and feel the love and support even from so far away! It truly lifted my spirits and helped me more than you know!

I Miss My Ankles....

Oh normal body....how I miss thee! Let me count the ways! ha!

* Swollen hands

* swollen feet

* achey back, joints, neck, hips, arms, legs, basically entire body!

* blurry eyes

* pounding head

* "the waddle"

* never ending stretching stomach

* bursting (literally) stretch marks

* ability to sleep without waking up every hour

...... Just to name a few!

Don't get me wrong pregnancy is an amazingly wonderful experience but the toll it takes on your body is SO NOT "amazingly wonderful!" ha! The past few nights I have literally laid in bed and contemplated if it is really worth attempting to roll over to try and get more comfortable because of the effort it takes! ha! What if I use all that energy to flip over and realize that I was more comfortable the other way?! Decisions...Decisions!

Besides the bursting stretch marks (yes- they are literally bursting and bleeding....SO painful! I had the same thing happen when I was pregnant with Kelsie and there isn't much that can be done about it...I wish Wal-mart sold stretchier skin!) the worst thing has to be this new "blurred vision" thing! I have always had great vision so all of a sudden having to make the computer screen be on 200% so that I can read things is WHOA annoying! I feel like I am suddenly 88 years old! ha! I asked the Dr. about it this week and he said that my retinas are retaining fluid which is messing with my vision. How fun is that!

So I got to thinking...wouldn't it be nice if I could just stick a straw in my temple and let some of the fluid out? I am sure it would make my vision so much better and help to relieve some pressure from this headache I have had. For some reason Jordan didn't think this would be a good idea. No idea why....

I am so ready to feel normal again! I have been dreaming about it these days! Good news is I get a little bit closer to it every day! Granted once they come we will have to deal with the whole recovery from c-section and sleep deprivation with two babies deal....but let's just not think about that right now!

Let's just focus on positive things.... like the fact that my belly button still hasn't popped out -this is my biggest pregnancy fear! Totally freaks me out! I have told Jordan if it does pop out I am taping it back in.....and I am so serious! ha!

AND I can still reach to paint my own toenails - which right now are a very lovely copper color in honor of fall! If you have to waddle and carry around a bowling ball in your stomach...you might as well have cute toes!

I love percentages! Well....sometimes!

Do you see this sweet face?! Ah! It melts my heart already!!!!

It's only Tuesday and I have already had 5 Dr. appointments! Whew! Luckily there is only one more this week and it isn't until Friday!

Yesterday was the Fetal Heart Echo for Kohen. I was very anxious about it but we were trusting the Lord and had a peace going into the appointment. Of course there are all the "what ifs" going through your mind constantly so I had to to keep bouncing those thoughts! Jordan got out of class early unexpectedly so it was very nice that he was able to go with me and I didn't have to go alone.

It basically was like an ultrasound but it was focused on the heart. The ultrasound tech went through and took "still" pictures of all the different parts and from different angles and then the Dr. came in and did a video version. They watch the blood flow and how the chambers open and close when it is beating. The said of course they can't say 100% that nothing is wrong with his heart but they saw no major issues and everything was in the correct spot and working well! They are 85% sure that his heart is perfectly fine! Wahoo! They said if anything is a problem it would just be something small that the pediatrician will pick up on after he is born. We are praising the Lord for this news!!!! And of course they could see that it said "I LOVE MOMMY!" all over it! ha!

Today I had a regular Dr. appt then the ultrasound growth scans and a stress test! Whew! That makes me tired all over again just to type it all! ha! After my first appointment they said to come home and have all my stuff packed as if I was going to the hospital because that would be decided after the growth scan. NOT fun! We already knew today was decision day but actually having to pack stuff and be ready did not help with the stress level! ha! But...we did it! 2 Cute Polka dot bags (Thanks to my Mama and Best Friend!), my new favorite blankie and pillow! ha!

The last growth scanned showed that there was a 23% difference between the boys weight. They want it to always stay less than 20%. This is why they decided I needed the be on bed rest two weeks ago so that the boys could have more opportunities (Esp. Kohen with having less vessels to his cord) to grow and the nutrients would get to them better. Today when they did the scan it showed that there was only a 16% percent difference between their weights!!! Which means......I get to stay at home in my comfy chair and own bed for at least another 2 weeks!!! Kohen weighed 3 lbs 3 oz and Kennan weighed 3lbs 13oz. We were so so so thrilled! I did a happy dance in the Doctors office! Literally! ha!

They will redo the scan again in two weeks. As long as it remains under 20% I can still stay home...otherwise I have to set up shop in the hospital. Jordan wants to take Guitar Hero and set it up there if I have to go.....for some reason I don't feel like other patients would like me very much if he did that! ha!

I am so thankful to be able to write this from my comfy chair! The Lord is hearing all of our (friends and family included!) prayers and is so faithful! We are so grateful for all he has done so far! We know that these little men are in His hands!

I will continue to be on bed rest until the boys are born....which let's just be honest is not fun...however, to see that it is actually working and these little boys are getting stronger makes it all worth it! And besides how will these people on TV solve crimes, pick out wedding dresses, and bring home babies without me?! They need me!

Thank you so much to each of you for all of you love, support, and encouragement! It has meant SO much to us and has truly lifted our spirits! Esp. mine!!! I am very thankful for each of you!